Trying Too Hard
The concept of "trying too hard" irks me. People are constantly being criticized for putting forth minimal effort, and yet we censure them for being overly enthusiastic, too. Talk about a lose-lose proposition. And yet, I've gotten several reader questions about...
Reader Request: Body Gratitude in the Face of Illness
Reader G e-mailed me with this question: What happens when your body has "betrayed" you by being ill? I really struggle with this. I often read that you should love your body for what it is able to DO rather than what it looks like (a sentiment that I agree with) but...
Can’t Wear That
I may weigh in on style rules around here, but I can't say I'm terribly fond of them. Understanding them, knowing why they exist and how they work, and applying them occasionally as guidelines works just fine. But crafting every outfit around them? I'll pass....
The Question of Health
OK, I'll admit it: I daydream about getting my big break. Catching the eye of some well-placed luminary and being given the chance to spread my message everywhere they'll let me, across media, across boundaries, all over the world. But there's a question I've been...
Match vs. Go
Here's a concept that manages to be both simple and tough to master: Outfits that match, versus ones that "go." This outfit matches. My red accessories mirror the red in the pattern of the shirt. And although the khaki skirt isn't anywhere in the shirt's color scheme,...
Body Image in the Bedroom
A while back, Mar left this comment on a post about body image: Have your negative body image issues ever affected your relationship with your romantic partner? This is what I am struggling with right now. I go through these cycles of feeling flabby, outright fat,...
In Defense of Pretty
I love this poem and its amazing author. I've watched this video more times than I can count, and it stirs me every single time. This poem challenges the pervasive notion that women must do everything in their power to look as pretty as possible. At all times and at...
Imperfect Forms and Formless Masses Re-examined
It’s taken me a long time to learn about my body. Both in terms of appreciating its lovely form as-is, and in terms of helping it look amazing as often as possible by wearing clothes that work WITH it instead of AGAINST it. And before I learned these things, I hid...
How to Be a Body Image Role Model
E. dropped this one into the suggestion box back in July: I would love to see a piece on how you can positively influence the self esteem of others around you. I find that I often have girl friends who have such poor self esteem and body image, and they look at me (I...
Be Kind to Yourself
We learn from a very young age that showing kindness to others is good, admirable, wise. We are taught to forgive our peers their trespasses, be patient with friends and family, offer support and love and understanding to all who seek it. And we learn from a very...
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